A dog and a whore

So here in Las Vegas there has been a huge news story about a bulldog named Reba. Poor Reba she was put in a plastic container in the summer. They found her and tried to save her but they couldn't.  The police have been searching for the man who was seen on video dumping her. Tonight he has been arrested and will be charged with a felony  and the town cheers.

My rapist however never got arrested. There is video of him too. So why the fuck after months of begging DAs office AGs office to tell me what happened without comparing me to a whore, I got not a single thing other than an excuse that isn't in accordance to the law of this state. 

I have tried for months to get any media outlet at all to report on this story. Any of them I don't care who. Just I need some damn support on this because one voice, as loud as mine is, just isn't getting answers. I'm just not getting them. And no one cares. 

as I sit here tonight I am rage tweeting about the fucking dog. Why the fuck does the dog matter more than I do? Why does a dog get felony charges and arrest and media coverage. I've been begging for help. I have been told he wasn't that important, I have been told the video is too graphic, I've been told (and this one gets me) that they can't do he said she said. The actual fuck he said she said I am fucking screaming in that video. I am begging him to stop. He said-she said? Are you actually out of your mind. 

then I have guys who just can't watch the video because it's too horrific. Poor babies must be so hard to watch me being raped for them. I am so sorry for them that they had to have that inflicted upon them. I can't imagine watching such a thing. Wait, yeah I can I can also remember distinctly the feel of his nails scrapping down my vagina while I begged. But, you watch it I feel bad for you. Yeah let me know if you need a hug. 

I am so fucking pissed off about that a dog being  so much more important than I am in this town. More important to the media. More important to the DA. More important to the people. 

I feel so much more worthless right now. I can't believe this is society. You arrest a man who hurts a dog and send a man who hurts a woman to a shiney new office across the country. But Steve Wolfson did indeed make it clear to me I was less than a whore so I think the hierarchy goes

Dog>Whore>Me

im just a rape victim. I don't matter. I can't get anyone to call me back. No one actually cares. I'm not even sure why I started this website. Nothing is ever going to change. He will live his life happily ever after and I just don't even know how to exist anymore. I don't. 

I have been broken so many times. I'm not crazy I am ridiculously traumatized. No one will listen to me. That's his thing, I'm crazy. Yeah I am in therapy and on meds and he is a psychotic alcoholic who does neither while raping women. And I'm the crazy one in this case. I'm nuts he's normal. How is that right? 

hoe exactly is any of this right? How is this just and fair and reasonable? How? I don't get it. I don't understand. I have read the laws. I may not be a lawyer but I'm a historian who has been publish on amendments. I know how to read law and understand case law and the law in Nevada specifically states that even in a relationship it is rape, much like domestic battery. So what Wolfson told me is completely incorrect based off of the law. I went home with him. He raped me for 5 more months. That's just the rape I have on video. There were dozens more. So I don't understand. I really cannot understand any of this and the more I look the worse it gets. And no one will give me an answer and no one in the media will report on it and no one anywhere will help me. 

I didn't deserve this. I didn't. I really didn't. I deserve to at least be heard. I deserve at least a fraction of the air time and the justice that a dog gets. Don't get me wrong, I love dogs. I had to give mine up because I couldn't take care of myself let alone them. It was better for them. I miss them. I really I feel for Reba but I need someone to feel for me right now. 

RIP Reba. Didn't mean to take this out on you but, you're a good girl and I hope you get it.